Last year, during football season, I tried to explain the LSU/Alabama drama, via a post entitled The Jilted Lover. Imagine my surprise this past week when I opened up the USA Today after a grueling day on the road to find Glenn Guilbeau’s piece entitled, Saban’s Homecoming Inspires Emotion from LSU Faithful. Here’s the opening paragragh:
Like jilted lovers, LSU fans will be waiting Saturday night at Tiger Stadium for former coach Nick Saban’s arrival. He will have a new love in his arm wearing vivid red and adorned with the No. 1 ranking LSU had in January.
Coincidink? I doubt it. I still get a fair number of hits daily on this post and Mr. Guilbeau has evidently been to Music Maven before. I have to admit, it is a good analogy. So, I want to roll just a little bit further with it.
So yesterday, the ex-girlfriend (Saban) came back to the hometown with slick, Big Al on her arm. I have to admit that I still can’t stand either of them, but I’m pretty content with my own big wedding last year (National Championship) and my own new beau (Les Miles). While I’d still like to be Belle of the Ball and in the spotlight right now, I know that my new marriage is just going through the growing pains of starting out a life together (and an inexperienced Redshirt Freshman QB).
Does it hurt to see them together? Yes. Do I wish that both would fall flat on their faces? Yes. But all I can control is my situation and I have to admit, it’s a pretty good one. As we came face to face on Saturday, I felt mocked and put down. I felt the anger rise and I wanted nothing more than to see them both humiliated and knocked off their perch. And then, after a while it began not to matter. I felt very disconnected from this person who I was once at one with. This Ex was but a stranger to me now and my affection for my new love deepened. Through good times and tough times, she’s been loyal, loving and committed to our relationship, constantly trying to please me. We are now, truly, like peas and carrots.
So, Big Al and the Ex may be on to their own “big dance” and I wish them well. Our meeting proved that I’m not the pushover they thought I was. Even though I didn’t win the fight, I gave them a run for their money, showing that I’ve still got what it takes.
After a sound trouncing of Louisiana Tech, 58-10, LSU is back on top….back to where they once belonged….
Get Back, The Beatles
….get back, LO-retta.
And, I gotta say that one week removed from the “crashed wedding”, it still feels good. Even better, actually, since Mississippi State put the hurt on the great Saban Nation. Sweet Home Alabama never looked so good:
HEY, PEOPLE! The LSU Tigers are, once again, #1 in the Nation.
Well, I thought that the defeat would be sweeter. A bit more important than all the rest. However, after all the hype, hurt feelings and emotion, at the end of the day….it was really just another win. Another come-from-behind, gutsy talent win….but a win, nonetheless.
As the jilted lover, however, I wanted it to hurt, really hurt. After all, my old girlfriend, Nick Saban, deserved absolute humiliation, right? Well, maybe. I must say that Mr. Saban seems mighty recalcitrant regarding his old team and I’m just not convinced that his heart is “into” Big Al. But, despite 14 penalties for 130 yards resulting in 6 first downs for Alabama — in addition into three turnovers — LSU prevailed.
That, just doesn’t happen to a storied program like Alabama. Unless, you are extraordinarily talented and under matched. LSU dominated time of possession, total yardage and total defense. By all accounts, the score should have been at least a two touchdown differential. But it wasn’t.
Because of LSU’s total brain fart — or perhaps their over-emotion in trying to deliver a win for THEIR new girlfriend — the game stayed close with the “money” players delivering in the final minutes of the game.
So, Les Miles, should be happy to get away with the win, right? Nope. The dude is pissed. Pissed because his team was obviously superior to the Tide, yet kept them in the game with STUPID penalties and mistakes. They squeezed out a win and ascend to #2 in the rankings, but Les is still pissed and someone will pay.
Now, some people think that Les is a loose cannon, an idiot, a guy who doesn’t deserve this talented team and is squandering their potential. What these critics fail to acknowledge is that Les, at 30-5, is significantly better than the great “St. Nick” was for the same timeframe and that he is poised to produce ANOTHER 11 win season and a possible National Championship. Why so much Les hate? Where’s the Les love? Perhaps there is a green-eyed monster that rears its ugly head around the SEC….
Les Miles is a great coach. Les is a winner. If he wasn’t, he’d have made a few comments after Saturday’s game about playing valiantly and escaping with a win. Instead, here’s what Da Hat had to say:
“We kept fighting, kept struggling and found a way to win,” Miles said. “I can tell you, that’s as many mistakes as I’ve seen in a football game in my life.
“I promise you this. That’ll never happen again. I promise you that. Our football team will be coached very aggressively from this point forward. We’ll never play that poorly again.”
Miles vowed that the mistakes will “be addressed slowly, painfully and over a long amount of time.”
Les expects more from his team, just like a good leader would. He will make these young men understand what it takes to be a winner and to live up to your potential. And yes, he’s crazy. Crazy like a fox. Perhaps Les’ “gumption” and smarts can best be defined by these Les facts (ok, so I borrowed some of these from Chuck Norris, but it’s all kind of relevant in my mind):
Some kids piss their name in the snow. Les Miles can piss his name into concrete.
Les Miles’ calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Les Miles.
Les Miles’ tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
Les Miles counted to infinity – twice.
Les Miles sleeps with a night light. Not because Les Miles is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Les Miles.
Les Miles’ dog is trained to pick up his own poop because Les Miles will not take shit from anyone.
Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards. Les Miles can throw Brett Favre even further.
On the 7th day, God rested…. Les Miles took over.
Les Miles has never blinked in his entire life. Never.
Les Miles once taught a class called “Ass Kicking 101”. There were no survivors.
If at first you don’t succeed, you’re not Les Miles.
I have spent the better part of this whole week basically doing two things.
1. Listening to and refuting delusional claims by Alabama Crimson Tide fans that their mediocre team is superior to the #3 ranked LSU Tigers.
2. Trying to explain why many LSU fans hate Alabama Coach Nick Saban with the intensity of 1,000 suns.
Not sure that I made much headway on #1, but I came up with an analogy that I think sums up #2 quite clearly. First, let me define the “players” (no pun intended).
LSU Fans = The Jilted Lover
Nick Saban = The Lying Ex-Girlfriend
Les Miles = The “Great” New Girlfriend
Alabama Crimson Tide = Big Al a/k/a The Jerk
While I was Tag Surfing for LSU/Alabama fodder, I found a tight little blog called 3rd Saturday in Blogtober. There I found a post that asked the question, “Why do LSU fans hate Saban so?” Since I have to deal with Bama and Auburn fans daily and became pretty proficient in my arguments defending #2 above, I had a pretty good analogy to adequately explain the “Saban Hater” phenomenon. It was so effective that blogmaster, Crimson Daddy posted my analogy comment as a post.
….is honored.
Here is the re-posting of said analogy:
Here’s an analogy that might shine a little light on the LSU fan/Saban love-hate thing:
Let’s say you meet a girl and she is the absolute love of your life. She’s perfect. Treats you like a king, laughs at your dumb jokes and generally makes you feel really good about yourself — better than you have in a long time. You spend three glorious years together and you think, “This is the one.” You contemplate marriage and just before you pop the question, she lets you know that while she still loves you, she has bigger dreams — dreams that she can’t fulfill living there, in your small town, with you.
Because you love her, you let her go. Off to her big career in the big city, yet knowing that she didn’t really leave you — she left the small town life for more opportunity. After all, she still speaks fondly of you and you are really good friends.
Then, a few years later, you hear through the grapevine that she’s dating a guy IN YOUR SMALL TOWN that used to beat you up in high school. A guy that you have despised since childhood and who has really been mean to you over the years. We’ll call him Big Al.
You question your old girlfriend about the relationship. “No way. I don’t know how to say it any plainer. I am not nor am I going to be Al’s girlfriend.”, she assures you.
Then, two short weeks later, your Mother calls to tell you that said old girlfriend is moving back to town — you know, the one she said wasn’t big enough to hold her — and get this….she’s engaged to Big Al. Getting married in the Fall.
So, tell me….do you show up at the wedding with a present or a with an axe to grind?
I also added that while you might be happy with your “new love”, you’re still pissed because your old girlfriend lied to you about dating Big Al, your mortal nemesis and you feel that you were never really special, after all.
One poster asked, “So when do you ‘get over it’?”. I responded:
I’ll get over it once I feel that I have made the ex-girlfriend feel as bad as I felt when I heard the news of her impending nuptials….beating her by 14 points or more in her home stadium.
Make no mistake. This is a big game for the Tigers. A loss would assuredly dash any hopes for a National Championship and likely, a SEC Championship. While it’s an important road game for the team, it is THE game of the season for the fans. The jilted lovers. We want a win. A big win. A “beat their ass into the ground, make their coach cry” win. To show the ex-girlfriend that he made a huge mistake when he left us. To make him, uh her, sorry for leaving us, for lying to us, for betraying us with a bitter rival.
There’s lots of talk in lots of circles that LSU is overrated. That the Tide is underrated. That it’ll be a tough contest. That LSU will be lucky to win this one. That Les Miles has everything to lose and nothing to gain. That Nick Saban “owns” LSU.
As usual, I follow the money. The handicappers set the initial line at LSU -7. That has increased to -7.5 as of Thursday night. That indicates that people are betting LSU and is usually directionally accurate. Considering that Bama is at home (good for 3 points in the spread) and LSU is favored by 7.5 means that bookies are figuring that LSU is at least 10 points better than Alabama. Of course, as this crazy season has proven, anything can happen. However, if LSU gets there and takes care of their business, it should be a relatively easy win.
Maybe with a win LSU can quell some of the delusions of Bama fans and their unnatural mortuusmania concerning Bear Bryant and the incessant exaggeration regarding National Championships. Here’s a newsflash for the Tiders:
No matter how they may squint, Nick Saban is NOT the new “Bear”. He ain’t even the old Nick. Come Saturday night, LSU will be “over” the old coach. The new coach will see to it, crazy bastid. So, for all those Bama fans, I have three words:
Music Maven 